Unaverage Joe

Gobble

That's EGGSactly what I'm gonna do this Thanksgiving. Turkey Day is at my house, so I am the chef. I already prepared the turkey yesterday/Tuesday, so it is sitting in my garage marinating.



I am deep frying the bird this year. Now that I live in the south (Washington, D.C.), I gotta do the southern thAng. Y’all. But it’s not new to me. I did it back when I was up north (Chicago). It was always a big hit. In fact, the last time I did it, my Father’s friends brought their turkeys over so I can cook them. Ha! The wonderful thing about deep-frying is the speed. Forget the hours on end in the oven. Deep frying will produce a fully cooked bird in LESS than an hour. Oh, and another advantage… the taste! We all had the dry turkey. Those days are over. When you introduce the turkey to oil that is almost 400 degrees, it instantly sears the skin, therefore keeping the juices inside. Not to mention keeping the oil outside, so it’s not unhealthy as you may think when you hear “deep fried.” Well, onto my mission for a successful Thanksgiving. I hope.

First off, I purchased a big-daddy Bayou Classic 44 quart deep fryer at Costco. This thing is bad ass.



Everything is a beautiful stainless steel, right down to the injector. This thing is like a hypodermic needle for Frankenstein. It’s so nice, it makes you want to shoot heroin!



Now that I have the fryer, I picked up the propane-filled tank at Home Depot. (Thank God for building one recently that’s practically walking distance to the house.)



Next is the turkey. The typical “family turkey” is about 25 pounds. At least, that’s what I used to buy. I wouldn’t suggest this size for frying; get one no larger than 15 pounds. And it’s quick to fry, so don’t worry about time if you need/want to cook multiple turkeys like I have in the past. The second time around is actually quicker, since the oil is very hot. I settled on a 12-pound Butterball.





I also picked up a few other items at the store to complete the project. Now, to prepare…

I like to marinate the turkey. I do it a few DAYS before frying. You do this by injecting marinade into the thick portions of the bird. This year I cheated by buying the marinade rather than making it myself. I picked up a bottle of Kikkoman Roasted Garlic & Herbs.



I took out the giblets, washed down the bird (inside & out), stuck the needle in the bottle, filled up the syringe, and went to work. As you pump marinade into the bird, you will see the skin bubble up as the marinade fills the cavity. I’m like a turkey’s plastic surgeon giving it fat implants. It’s a good feeling.





Once I’ve exhausted all the areas, I give the bird a dry rub. I used whatever I had in the kitchen, so I used seasoned salt, chili pepper, cumin, crushed red pepper, black pepper, salt, thyme, sage, and Adobo seasoning. (I get this from Latino supermarkets.) I mix it in a bowl, and then I turn the bird upside down. I work the rub into every corner: under the wings, in the neck hole, etc. I turn it back up, and place it in the disposable aluminum turkey pan. I finish rubbing the turkey on top, covering the drumsticks, inserting my hand inside the cavity, etc. As I rub the turkey, some of the marinade spills out from the holes where I injected it.




When I’m finished, I top it off with tin foil, and leave it in my garage until Thanksgiving. The good thing about cold weather is that it acts as a refrigerator in case yours is full. Just be careful not to leave it on your deck where animals can get to it like the squirrels did to my friend’s mother’s sweet potato pie one year. Ha ha!

I essentially did the same thing with the giblets, but I put the spices and marinade in a Ziploc bag, placed the pieces in there, and shook it up. That is sitting in the fridge. I may include it in the fryer, or I may do something else with it. I’ll take a vote on Turkey Day.




When deep frying, I like to use peanut oil for several reasons: it doesn’t smoke too much, the taste, and that it’s not as unhealthy as other oils. (Speaking of healthy, this is the second time I’ve mentioned it. Since I am on a health kick, I am going to cook with the health factor in mind, so this year will not include the typical mashed potatoes smothered in cheese or marshmallow and sweet potato pies.)



And while I’m on oils, I feel I need to make mention of this important fact – you will read to place the turkey in the fryer, and then fill it up with water to give you an idea of how much oil to add. This is wrong. Very wrong. You may have read of those banjo-picking hillbillies who burnt down their homes deep-frying their turkeys indoors. Well, that almost happened to me the first time I fried a turkey at my old house. What recipes don’t tell you is that oil e-x-p-a-n-d-s when heated. A lot. So the first time I did this, the oil was nice & hot, and I was lowering the turkey into the pot. You can imagine what happened next - it was the peanut oil version of Niagara Falls. Not good! And don’t forget all the water cascading out of the pot right onto the flame - which is attached to a propane tank!! Well, God was with me that day, since I’m still here. And the house is still standing. I was always reminded of that day whenever it snowed or rain, since that spot on my patio always deflected water. LOL! I was wondering what happened, since I filled the oil to the same level as the water. And then science class kicked in. Note to self: next time, fill the oil ¾ of the way as water. If you need more, simply add more oil.

Stay tuned…

posted by Unaverage Joe @ 2:18 PM